Thursday 14 July 2011

I rant!


I have ants in my pants.  I am getting so edgy that I can hardly sit still.  That feeling where you know that you’re not where you should be but you know you can’t move forward just yet.  I feel like I want to tear away and do something out of character, something crazy.  I want to take risks.  I want to go out there and change the world.  I want to make my mark.  I want to move.  I just don’t know where.

I write, I read, I cook, I study, I work.  I like learning new things.  I want to be challenged with new ideas.  I want new experiences.  I am tired of being content.  And yet what I am searching for is contentment.

I know that everybody fits somewhere.  I know that everything has its place but I feel like mine was moved.  I need space to grow and expand.  I want to expand.  Now.

I want to move and change and yet all I want is a quiet life.  I don’t want to climb mountains.  I want to be able to do what I love forever.  Yes, I want to be content.  But I don’t want to be complacent.  I don’t want to be satisfied with what I have just because that is what I have.  I know that there is something more out there; I just need to go out there and find it.

6 comments:

  1. Yeah... I think you might want to pick up a new hobby. :-)

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  2. Not another one! Nooooooo!!!1!1!!

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  3. I think getting anstsy and wanting to do something greater than ourselves, to make a mark, and have a purpose is normal. We're designed to want to move forward and find contentment, without being complacent.

    There is something more out there. You'll figure out what it is...eventually! :)

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  4. All young people go through this phase of wanting to change the world. In reality, if you aren't born rich and beautiful, chances are very small that it will actually happen. But there's always that chance...

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  5. You need to get out there and travel. Immersing myself in another culture always calms my fiery spirit. :)

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  6. Thanks, Jessica. That is really encouraging. It helps to know that it is at least somewhat normal.

    Michael, I am not sure it is just a phase :) I have always wanted to be part of something greater. The problem is that every now and then the dream gets pushed aside by other, more "real" things. Complacency. I can't let that happen.

    Pk, guess what? I'm going traveling soon! So I think I can follow up on that one!

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